Why Are You Afraid To Live?
The answer that I have come to for myself is:
I am fearful that if I truly live I will have to obliterate the current world I have created. I’ll be out here -> FREE. Although this is my desired reality – it is foreign to me. It excites and scares the shiz niz out of me.
You see I have lived on auto-pilot. Mindlessly doing all the things I have been told I need to do – to have the best life.
- Get the Degree (s).
- Get the 9 to 5 (with the bombest 401K).
- Get the Side Hustles.
- Get to Climbing ALL the Ladders!
- Get the X, the Y, and the Z!
Although incredibly thankful for every opportunity, connection, life lesson, and growth. No one tells you that after checking off all these things you most likely will end up:
Imprisoned by a Multitude of Systems
Asking:
What has happened to ME?
I’ll tell you what has happened:
We gave up our identity trying to fit into society. This is why we feel crazy inwardly. Our mind, body, and soul is trying to:
Reject The Programming
Instead of trying to repress it and drown it out with distraction. I have decided to:
Let Go & Let It Happen
I am no longer hiding behind illusions and masks. It’s time to stand as I am. lothrifthistyle.com has served its purpose. I am done holding the wall. I am living “unboxed”. So finally:
Lonisa Mari is committed to removing as many masks as possible and truly being as is -> however…that looks at the time. It may look together & it may look a hot mess. How one perceives it is not for me to carry. You see:
I came to terms with the fact that
– Interlude 1 by Lauryn Hill
I had created this, uh, public persona, this public illusion
And it became, it, it held me hostage
Like I couldn’t be a real person because
You’re too afraid of, you know
Of, of what your, your public will say And at that point I had to do some dying
And really accept the fact that, look
This is who I am, and I have to be who I am
And all of us have a right to be who we are
And whenever we submit our will Because our will is a gift, it’, it’s given to us
Whenever we submit our will
To someone else’s opinion, you know
I mean, a part of us die
As Ms. Lauryn Hill’s “Unplugged” says:
It is FREEDOM time.
REBEL.
Just Like WATER: He’s purging me, he’s been cleaning me and moving me around.
REPENT.
Find PEACE of mind.
Fulfill your PASSION: That’s praising GOD & showing your appreciation for BEING ALIVE.
Blessings,
Lonisa Mari
Lonisa Mari 